Everyone Wanted a Farfisa

“‘Cause I can see the future, and it’s a place about seventy miles east of here, where it’s lighter.” (lyrics from Laurie Anderson’s “Let x = x”)

I keep thinking that my body’s changes are temporary, and that I’ll be reset at some point and my articulations will go back to being supple again. Not that being young was so great for me, other than the less achy parts of it. There are those who yearn for their happy, carefree days, but I had more cares then than I do now. Today is my happy, carefree time, even if it is a bit achy.

There’s so much to write about this time that I don’t know where to start, so I think I won’t. It’ll just be a stream of whatever (and as I am no longer as conscious as I used to be, middle age brain fog, so it can’t be stream of consciousness).

Last week, I saw Jupiter through a telescope. I saw three of its moons. I saw a leaf fall, and saw another one fly upwards in the thermal lift before a storm. I saw my neighbor holding a knife to his own throat because he didn’t want to be sent back to where he came from. I saw a music concert. Two of the musicians and I used to have a friend in common, but she died. She died slowly, over several years, after a failed suicide attempt, and then trying to live on with her bipolar disorder. I saw a great spotted woodpecker and watched it hunt for insects. I saw eight donkeys in a field. A few days later I saw a different group of eight donkeys. Is that a thing? I climbed two nice multi-pitch climbs, neither very hard but both very satisfying. I saw some friends. I ate a lot of salads. I am lost. I slept in late a few times. I missed sleep and meals another time. I don’t know what to make of all this.

At the observatory where I got to see Jupiter, we counted the lights flying across the darkened sky. “The satellites are out tonight” Laurie Anderson sang, in the same song. Let x = x. Let the beginning = the end. Let there be eight donkeys. Let there be lights in the sky a bit east of here. Let that be the future.

I am lost, but was brought back to Earth by the musical group. When Tortoise began making music back in the 90’s, everyone was into nostalgia. Back then, everyone wanted a Farfisa organ. Now retro is modern. We have come full circle.