(f)loss-ie

Flossie is the name of a cow in a US cartoon strip in the 1930’s. She was famously clothed at some point because censors thought that udders were too suggestive. Suggestive of what, of course, is up for discussion. Cheese?

The name “Flossie” sounds so odd to me. I don’t know where it came from. I don’t even think they had dental floss back then, so it couldn’t have been that. (Flossing to me is the ultimate investment in the future; it says, ‘I will live long enough to regret bad tooth hygiene.’)

But there is “loss” in “floss”, and there is so much loss in my life at the moment. I miss my dad. As far as conversations with him goes, he’s been gone for a little while now, but I still had him around for hugs, and to tell him I love him. In the end I just said that over and over again, and up until a week ago, he was able to understand that and repeat it over the phone. That helped. (He wasn’t sure if he was talking to me or my sister, but he loved both of us so that didn’t really matter.)

I’m sleeping weirdly. It’s 2am, and I miss my dad. I know he didn’t want a ceremony, but it would have been nice to have the occasion to say something, but he didn’t want that. (Why do people think that funerals are about them? It’s about the people living on afterwards and they should get to do whatever they want.)

So I didn’t get to have a ceremony, but I have the blog. I miss my dad. I love him. If he still had his health, I would say that I wished he was here. He didn’t in the end, so I’m grateful that he died without having too much pain, and that he wasn’t ill for very long.

Fara is good for traveling, but a bit small for hugs. At least she’s here. Foro doesn’t have udders, and he has a cool sweater. I wanted her to match so I made her a t-shirt. It is true that I found that her udders made her less cute. What do you think?