Hope

How much of these weird feelings I’ve been having are about my own, personal situation and how much are about the state of world? I don’t know that I was always exactly a hopeful person, but I think I’ve been a glass half full type. I’ve written about this before; it’s not natural or easy. I work at it. I try not to let the world get me down. I try very, very hard sometimes.

I’m not going to write about the obvious problems of the world because this blog is about trying to send out one positive thing a week. It’s my instant positive feedback loop; I think it, I write it, I post it, I feel better (personally) and there’s just the sliver of a chance that someone might read it and feel a bit better, too. It’s me helping myself and maybe helping a tiny part of the world.

But I want to address the weird feelings I’ve been having, which come from two sources. The personal: I’m getting older and this has never happened to me before. Every new experience — pregnancy, losing virginity, dying, whatever — is scary when it’s happening to us, even though it’s just the stuff of human existence. The world: I used to think that everything we’ve experienced is just a variation of things that have happened before, but I think there’s potential that the AI “revolution” could turn into something really, really scary, and new. I seriously want to be wrong about that and if I’m not, it’s not like predicting this correctly is going to make me happy.

So I’m going to make a case for hope. Sometimes things just go right, you know? Like I went climbing last weekend and because of a long line of people for the easier climb, we tried a harder route, and it worked. In spite of my aches and pains, my difficulties doing all sorts of things that were easy in the past, last weekend, it worked. And I am so grateful.

I’ve made some new friends in the last few years. I think they may wind up being close friends, long term friends. It’s nice. I am grateful.

I have an easier schedule this week at work, and I’m already (I mean, it’s only Monday) working on a few projects that just needed some head space to think about. The fog is staying down below in the valley today and I had breakfast on my balcony. When I did a few standing poses during my yoga practice this morning, I didn’t fall over on my face. All these things are good. I appreciate all of them. It’s not all bad. There is hope.